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May 19, 2015 12 Comments

Surviving a Moral Failure on Church Staff – Rainer on Leadership #125

Podcast Episode #125

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Moral failures can be devastating to a church and to a church staff. Today, we cover nine specific ways to deal with this often cataclysmic event in the life of a church.

Some highlights from today’s episode include:

  • There is an inclination to keep quiet when things go wrong in a church, but that often hurts more than helps.
  • Christ-like grace is forgiving but it understands that sin has its consequences.
  • The transition from denial to anger is often quick in the wake of a crisis.
  • It typically takes at least a year for a church to recover from a moral failure on staff.
  • The pastor can become an easy target for misdirected anger after a crisis in a church.
  • Once a moral failure has occurred on a church staff, the church’s character is redefined.
  • There are few occurrences in the church which require greater leadership than when dealing with moral failure on staff.

The nine keys to surviving a moral failure on church staff are:

  1. Be as transparent as possible.
  2. Understand the different parties impacted by the failure.
  3. Demonstrate grace in the midst of fallenness.
  4. Understand that the church will go through the stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.
  5. Be prepared to be the object of anger.
  6. Recovery and acceptance is usually longer than we anticipate.
  7. The church will likely lose members.
  8. The church’s character is redefined.
  9. Strong leadership is required.

Episode Sponsor

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Feedback

If you have a question you would like answered on the show, fill out the form on the podcast page here at ThomRainer.com. If we use your question, you’ll receive a free copy of Autopsy of a Deceased Church.

Resources

  • Nine Stupid Things I Did as a Pastor
  • Church Answers

Related

Comments

  1. Dan says

    May 19, 2015 at 9:26 am

    Thanks for sharing this – very good points here. I wanted to point out that sometimes it isn’t a staff person, but a church member’s moral failure that damages the congregation’s fellowship and ministry as well. In the last several years, two churches in my community had treasures who were arrested for embezzling church funds. Both did prison terms. In one case, the amount was over a quarter of a million dollars, so the local prosecutor got wind of it, brought in state police, and brought charges against the treasurer who then went to prison. The pastor told me that a number of church members, including the treasurer’s family, were angry at him and blamed him for bringing in the police, which he hadn’t done. He got through it and is still pastor of the church, but it was a terrible time for him, his family, and the church.

    Reply
    • Thom Rainer says

      May 19, 2015 at 11:10 am

      Thanks for sharing, Dan. Your example is tragic, but your point is on target.

      Reply
  2. Louise says

    May 19, 2015 at 12:16 pm

    It’s not unusual for pastoral moral failing to have a foundation of a “yes” board and/or other staff in relation to it. Too many who never questioned the pastor (or perhaps other leadership), too many who maybe doubted sometimes, but were unwilling to speak up about small or large concerns. The overflow of moral failing however, is great, as the list indicates, and can do deep spiritual damage to innocent members of the congregation who get caught in the crossfire (as it were), caught in the effects of the moral laxity. Too often leadership that fails morally inspires other staff in the church to moral failing as well, if only because it’s realized that no one is minding the store (if you will). The more church members and church board members care about the smallest “issues” in the church, the more diligent we all are, the less likely a huge issue like a moral failing will grow, and get out of control.

    Reply
  3. C. R. says

    May 19, 2015 at 2:54 pm

    we have been navigating through such a challenge. I learned a valuable lesson the last time we went through a difficult challenge: there is no problem or sin that can destroy a Church, but the way I handle it can…
    God has been so very good as we have wept and prayed for guidance, treading lightly and openly through this latest circumstance. We were very quick to cooperate with Homeland security and the local authorities. We have suffered through rumors and gossip and lies from the media and other Pastors and Churches in our area, but God has not abandoned us! We have lost no members, in fact, God has seen fit to save many during this time, and we have added 2 families. We have started a new men’s ministry as a result of this and we are seeing God glorified. We are not through it. Min fact, it will never be “over”. The family is still with us and our Church has rallied around them in love and help. It is very humbling to watch God heal and work knowing that we don’t deserve His love or His grace or His mercy….

    Reply
  4. Gary Lewis says

    May 20, 2015 at 9:41 am

    Sadly, I learned from a staff I was leading that as a pastor/leader you lose buy-in from some who immediately throw your entire track record out the door (many I led to Christ and had pastored for a decade plus) because they are convinced if you had been the pastor you should have been that this immorality would not have occurred on your church staff. That was the hardest part for me.

    Reply
  5. Lauren says

    May 22, 2015 at 12:54 am

    Our church went through a “moral failing” last year, and after 20+ years at this church, I have never been more proud to be a part of it! http://theapologista.com/2015/04/06/why-my-church-is-better-than-your-church-or-is-it/

    Reply
  6. Benjamin Potter says

    May 22, 2015 at 9:15 am

    I witnessed a situation where the moral failure of a PAST staff member caused an upheaval in a church. In this case, the event caused harm to the church where the person was on staff AND the church from which the person had moved. My relationship was with the first church (from which the staff member had moved on) and the hurt feelings were strong there as well as the place of the staff member’s current service.

    Reply
  7. Galeon says

    June 23, 2015 at 10:08 am

    I love this post! I’d like to hear more about how a church should hire staff. Different churches do it different ways. What are some pros and cons of going different routes. Do we hire within or outside the walls? The goal ultimately would be to lay hands quickly on no person as don’t want to hire a headache nor someone who doesn’t fit into the church’s DNA/Culture.

    Reply
  8. Havetousea Fakename says

    May 25, 2016 at 7:00 am

    I’m late to the party on this one. Thank you so much for leaving this up for so long. Do you encourage staff members to stay or to leave during a moral failure? I’m still not sure what our organization is planning on doing, but I’m looking for some insight anywhere I can get it.

    Reply
  9. Sharon says

    July 23, 2017 at 12:25 am

    What are the steps for recovery? Both as a church and as an individual?

    Reply

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